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How To Live In The Present | Forgiveness And Acceptance

There are many questions about ‘living in the present’. What it is? And how can we live in the present? Or there is really a thing like ‘living in the present?

People have talked a lot about living in the present moment but now, let’s dive into some other aspects of it so that you can understand it from a different perspective. It’s not going to be linear thinking, you have to ‘not try’ to understand everything that I'm going to say but you need to just read and read carefully so that you could gain some insights about it.


Don’t Catch the Present

A linear kind of thinking sometimes could misguide you, when understanding the ‘present moment’, I’ll also focus on what it’s not. And I think that would be more beneficial for you because I or any other person can’t give you the ‘present moment’. It’s not a thing. Directly saying about ‘present moment’ could make a belief for you and that’s not where good things happen. 

The present moment is not something that you can understand intellectually/mentally. You can only feel it when it’s there. ‘Present Moment’ is not like a maths question that you solve and you get the result and now you know what it is. It’s more like smoking a cigarette, until and unless you smoke the one, you’ll not know what it is. When you’ll be there, you’ll know. In life, there are many things that you can’t catch like love, peace, joy, etc. when your mind becomes so quiet then only you get these things. And even not ‘get’, these things come to you. Information about ‘present moment’ is not ‘present moment’.


Effortless Effort

A more deep thing you can try (try without effort) is that ‘pay more attention to thoughts’. Just look at the thoughts and understand the chattering of it, every link of it from where it starts and where it’s going. And also understand ‘who is the one that is chattering?’ is it different from ‘You’ or is it the same ‘You’?

Thinking is an essential part of our life. But don’t you think that you think a lot. It’s unnecessary chatter of the mind and taking energy from you. Thinking has its place. I think sometimes you need to stop it just to be aware of the present moment. And that’s how you tap into that state. There’s no method to get into that state because every method implies effort. ‘Present Moment’ is beyond efforts. 

Think about a time when you felt alive. Yes, if you are reading right now, I know you are alive. Alive means, deep down you felt joy, a state of presence, a state when you felt that time stopped, You that is free of all responsibilities at that time. We all have somewhere in life come across this scenario and I think this is very much fascinating to me. And I hope you feel the same. That’s a touch of ‘present moment’.

Aware of 'Now'

Bring your Attention back to the Present

We are so distracted that we think a lot. We think a lot and become over-thinker as well. And now over-thinking is a problem in our life. Just understand this thing. The pattern of it. The role of thinking as well. How this is affecting your life. Distraction is, in one sense, ‘not present in now’. If you are in now then you are not distracted. But if you are distracted then either you’ll think about the future or you’ll think about the past. And you’ll be far more away from the present though it’s really here and now.

A very simple practice you can do if you think you are very much distracted or you are not able to concentrate in present, is that you need to ‘bring your attention back to the present’. When you realize that you’ve been distracted then bring your attention back, don’t punish yourself for not being present. What you do just do it with full attention. It’s your small habits that’ll change you.


Word is not a Thing

Life is more than a word. Alive is more than a word. Love is more than a word. You can achieve many things but it’s not guaranteed that you can feel peace inwardly. Life is really happening right now. I think it’s beyond thinking. It’s beyond accumulating things. Of course, things get you some kind of convenience. But it’s not all. 

We are a very small species. We are very small in comparison to this universe though we give so much credit to ourselves that we’ve got a hell lot of control over us as well as over this universe though it’s what we think but that’s not the fact. It’s like we think that we are the ones maintaining all the things that are happening within and without. 

If you’ve read all this, you could wonder where is the solution or if not, then I assume you got what I've said. Because words have limitations. Words are not the thing. Word ‘water’ is not the actual water. Word is different from the thing itself. So, what I've talked about is only some means to the end but it’s not the actual end. You need to deep dive into it and understand every phrase so that you could understand that I'm not giving you anything, I'm giving you some questions that you should ask yourself. My words are not that thing what I’m talking about.


Bird’s View

A third person’s point of view also works when you are not in ‘present moment’. You need to see yourself as a third person so that you can understand the situation better of yourself. I think you also noticed that when you solve the same problem of another person, you guide them very well but when you are in that situation, you got disturbed. At that point, the third person’s point of view could help you to see things differently. And you can follow this approach anywhere even if you got disturbed or you are overthinking about something, just ask who is it that is overthinking? Ask yourself why things got such power to overpower you.


Forgiveness

In my opinion, many things are very important for us but are less talked about. ‘forgiving’ is one of them. I’m going to use ‘forgiving’ as a tool to tap into ‘present moment’. 

If you’ve something that always runs through your mind and if this is because of any person (let’s assume they did something wrong to you) then you are holding their memory. Memory is past. If you want to live in the ‘present moment’ then you can’t hold past or future. You need to get that away from you so that you can have only ‘present’. 

If you forgive that person then you’ll not hold the memory of it and there’ll be a time when you’ll be free of that and then you can possibly tap the ‘present’ state. So ‘forgiveness’ becomes a tool for you. A tool that works very well. So for that reason, ‘forgiveness’ becomes a very important aspect of your life. So ‘forgive’ more.

Your mind is a very tricky thing to understand, but when you understand its nature of it, you have power over yourself. Your mind doesn’t want to forgive somebody, your mind doesn’t want to be in the ‘present’. It always wants to chatter. It wants to hold the past and future. Understand the nature of it so that you can use it for your growth.


Acceptance

Acceptance is very much essential for us if we want to live in the ‘present moment’. Because when you are not accepting the thing that you are approaching then you are creating friction. And when there is friction you can not tap the ‘present state’. When you accept the thing as they are and for this, you give your full attention to that thing then you become aware of the present state that is not bound by thoughts. 

Think of yourself as you are invisible and everything is passing through you, I think that’s the acceptance. I’m not saying you don’t need to act. I’m saying just for the sake of understanding the present, think like that so that things could flow through you and have no power to shake you.


Reversal

‘Living in the Present’ is not always 24/7. Sometimes you need to think about your future, about your things, about some problems that you think you need to solve. Sometimes you need to think about the past also, sometimes the past can help you. Everything has its point of view to look at things. ‘Living in the Present’ is about living in the now, not necessarily always/every time.

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